Tag Archives: author

Tag, You’re it!

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Ok, I’m lazy. I’m gonna rip Kevin Crew‘s words, seeing as this is all his fault:

“Many of you will have realised by now that wherever the hint of a challenge lies, there also lies my interest in getting involved. So this weeks award for Fortuitously Timed Writers-Block Beating Inspiration falls squarely at the feet of Misty from Misty’s Laws, who has slapped me across the stubbly chops with the gauntlet of the Tag, You’re It challenge. The simple premise here is that the blogger answers a set of questions, then tags other bloggers in the hope they will take the challenge and pass it on to others themselves. As one of the list of bloggers victimised chosen lovingly by Misty, here follows that set of questions, and my own personal carefully considered responses….”

Onward and downwards:

1. Book or movie and why?

I’m a writer, so I am an avid reader… but I am also a massive film buff. However, when I do put films on these days, I’m still either reading or writing while the bloody thing is on the screen!

So, I’m going with book… no… movie… no.. no… book.

2. Real book or e-book?

Ahhh… now, 99% of the world will say paper book but if I didn’t have the Kindle on my iPhone I would read less than I do (which is a LOT, by the way). The beauty of having books in my pocket means that if a customer is held up on me (I’m a taxi-bus driver), then instead of sitting there with my dick in my hands, I can read instead.

Dick in my hands, eh…? Might start leaving my phone at home.

3. Funniest thing you’ve done in the last 5 years?

This has no relevance to anything.

One of my in-laws.

C’mon, read my other blogs. Start here.

4. Do you put yourself into the books you read/write or the movies you watch?

Y’know what… I don’t. I don’t think I ever have. I become so engrossed, at times, with what I’m watching/reading that I can see it from the perspective of the lead character.

Which is the whole point, right?

I wouldn’t want to write a story about a brow-beaten cop, struggling against zombies, and if a 19 year old girl picked it up, I’d hope she wasn’t reading it from her point of view!

Nb: I am writing a story about a brow-beaten cop fighting zombies. And I do condone 19 year old girls. Heartily.

5. How would your best friend describe you?

Well, seeing as my own 16 year old daughter called me a ‘cunt’ on the phone yesterday I don’t even wanna know what my fucking friends think of me. We could always ask Lee Richards. He’s one of those ‘friends’ who doesn’t let my head drop and tells me exactly how it is.

Painfully, at times.

6. Favorite kind of car and why? 

Yes. This be she.

Kev wrote about an E-Type Jaguar, and it is a gem. I used to have a 4 litre V8 S-Type which was a fucking rocket. I now have a Ford Focus ST in Ludicrous Orange (it is a colour… now). I like it because it is discrete.

Otherwise, I’ve always wanted a pimped out Range Rover… or a Dodge Charger. Or a decent Mustang muscle car.

7. Would your choice of party be a catered meal or barbecue out back?

Load it up with sluts and cocaine and I’ll have a party in a fucking broom cupboard.

8. What’s your favorite season and why?

Easy. Football season – either soccer or NFL. If we’re taking seasonal-season (?) then I’ve always been a bit partial to winter. I love how snow makes everything look much better. On the downside, all of the good-looking girls hibernate.

9. What specific lesson have you learned – Spiritual, educational, occupational?

Fuck off. The only lessons I am learning are piano lessons. I’m not spiritual, but I am nearing the end of an Open University course, so the educational one is in there somewhere.

I have learnt to not believe my own hype (seriously) as I walked into the Creative Writing

Idiots.

course thinking I’d smash it like a desperate housewife on a Wednesday morning. I was DESTROYED in one of my essays, and rightly so. Since then, I’ve upped my game and I concentrate on my writing and prose so much more.

As you can probably tell from this blog.

Right, fuckers?

10. Besides writing, what’s your favorite thing to do when you get some extra time?

I’d say ‘have sex’, but it’s been so long since I last did it that I think they might have changed it. Is it still as much fun?

Otherwise, it would be my playstation or hanging out with my five year-old boy as much as I can. In true Jode-style, he even tried to help me pick up a lady at a play park last week.

He kind of ruined it when he got fed up of me talking to her and snapped; “Dad, are you gonna ask her for her phone number or not, cos I wanna go to MacDonalds?”

I didn’t get the phone number.

But he did get his MacDonalds.

11. What’s one place you can be found at least one time every week?

In my bus, every day, writing those infamous facebook statuses. If you are one of the rare few who don’t know what I’m talking about, click the link down the right hand side and add me.

I might make you laugh.

********************************************************************************

Ok, I’m done. That clearly spiraled way out of control, but then Mr Crew knew it would happen which is why he recommended me.

Now, imma tag some folks. The first is Marni Mann – if only to completely counteract my stupidity. And also because I love her and she’s great.

The other is John Hardy Bell. We’re still on our race to see who gets their book published first.

Fuck it, anyone else that wants to join in, feel free. And if you’re one of the 100s of my readers who have never started a blog, then consider this your invite. Take the questions above, and colour me prose-ful.

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My Baby Has a Name

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No, I haven’t knocked someone up. Again.

I’ve got a name for The Book…

The Dead Outside

Yep, that’s it. That’s all this blog is about, but I can finally stop calling The Book, ‘The Book’, and now say ‘this is how far I’ve got with The Dead Outside’.

That is all.

[Quick update: Look what my glorious compadre Jason Tabrys just knocked up for me:]

With thanks to Jason Tabrys

Discipline. Or a staggering lack of…

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If you’re new to my blog, then you may be surprised to learn that I have been lacking in discipline lately.

If you’re not new, or just plain know me, or have read about what I got up to just over a week ago, then you’re probably sat there with a raised eyebrow uttering the words; “In more shocking news, the earth is round.“

So, the start of the month I wrote about knuckling down to NaNoWriMo (where I have to write 50k words of The Novel), hammering the Open University courses that I’m doing (Italian and Creative Writing), and generally just working hard.

I failed. Miserably.

I managed about 6,000 words of NaNoWriMo and I have 3 days left to rustle up 34,000 more. No one can do that. No one. But I am determined to have ALL those words written and ready for editing by the END OF THE YEAR.

I’m two weeks behind on the Italian course. I can claw that back. I’ve already transferred the CD to my iPhone and have been learning bits and pieces while at my ‘real’ job – driving a school bus.

I’m a week behind on the Creative Writing course. That isn’t a problem, as I smash that when I sit down to do it. In fact, I destroyed a weeks’ worth of coursework in one morning a couple of weeks back.

But, I’ve also let a few people down. Jay Tabrys has given me an opportunity to write for him and his www.welovecult.com and I’ve let him down, although technically I don’t start until 1st December. He’s the main reason I gotta get my shit together.

Marni Mann – always there, always encouraging me, always sticking by me. I owe her a book.

Anyway, I’m not gonna waffle on, but needless to say, I’m gonna pull my shit together and set things straight. No more drinking/partying/destroying cities until I’ve got things in order.

Oh, well except for London 16/17th December. Soulwaxmas party in Brixton. That’s gonna be my only big blow-out before New Year.

Promise.

One Giant Literary Step…

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If you follow me on Facebook (and feel free to add me if you don’t… I am a massive social whore) then you will have read about me basking in my own spotlight today after I managed to bag one of my short stories a slot in a forthcoming anthology:  New Tales of The Old Ones.

It’s a book about tales based around stories written by H P Lovecraft, a writer of ‘weird fiction’ who amassed a collection of horror books called the Cthulhu Mythos and the Necronomicon story cycles.

The editor – Michael Dick – actually asked me if I could turn a story in to be considered, so I obliged… although like a true writer I left it right up to the last minute to submit my tale!

I hammered it and hammered it in those final weeks, finding myself completely drawn into the tale, loving the characters and the beast that I had created… remembering how much I loved to write and what a world of escapism it is to be in.

But I digress… My name is going to be in print, and a good year before I had envisaged it! If you recall my blog from January this year, I was hoping to get The Book finished by the end of the year. She’s currently sitting at 20,000 words and 40+ pages, but I now have the added incentive of actually believing that I can get it published now that someone has accepted my work!

So, yeah, this is a bit of a ‘filler’ blog, and I know I haven’t written anything of any real substance blog-wise for a few weeks now, but that’s all about to change with some of the big events I’ve got lined up.

I’ll also reveal all the info on the anthology I will be in as soon as I have the details myself.

Stay tuned.

I Think I’m About To Do Something Really Stupid.

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Regular readers/friends/followers will know that at the turn of the year I wrote a book about wanting to become a writer. It isn’t a faze or a new ‘thing’ I wanted to do, but it’s something I’ve been doing since before I could walk. Literally.

So, this year I ‘came out’. The Book is what most people ask me about when I bump into them, and I always answer ‘steadily’, or ‘slowly’, or a little of both, but – as I’ve written in previous blogs – I’m writing for so many other things The Book has kind of slid down my list of priorities at the moment.

For instance, I’ve submitted a short story about zombies for a book that’s being released soon, and I’ve been asked to submit another short story to a book based on H P Lovecraft‘s tales. If either/both of these get accepted I will have become a PUBLISHED AUTHOR!

And that’s all I’ve wanted all my life.

But, ‘life’ is getting in my way a lot these days. We’ve just had a crazy week at work (I drive a bus) due to the island being covered in rich, posh people for Cowes Week last week, and I hardly got a word written. The Lovecraft deadline is fast approaching and I’m halfway through the 7,000 words required.

So, every spare moment I have involved trying to get this short story finished, which means The Book hasn’t been touched in almost a month… and that kills me. I’m starting to hate myself when people ask me how it’s coming and I feel like I’m letting them and myself down when I explain that I’m writing other things. I feel like I’m cheating on The Book!

‘Work’ are also pressing me to take on more shifts, and then take into consideration the two Open University full time courses I start soon and The Book looks like it’s going to be unloved for a little while.

And I had fully expected to have finished it by Christmas!

I have to sort this out. I need my zombie tale to be my life again…

So, there’s only one thing I can think of doing.

Quit work. Quit driving for a living.

Yep, bin it all in and write, write, and write some more. I’ve worked out that I can get up early and get words onto paper/screen from 7am til 9am before eating breakfast, then attacking it all day until I exhaust myself!

Sure, I’ll be losing money, but someone (my boss, ironically!) told me that I should always chase my dreams, and my ONE BIG DREAM has always been to become a published author.

And surely that’s a dream I can achieve… surely it’s worth all the struggle.

So, basically, what I’m doing is throwing it out to you guys to see what you all think. I promise you that this decision has been completely on my mind for the last two weeks, and I’m so unsure as of what to do I figured I needed a little guidance.

Can you help me out?

A Writers’ Workload

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Since I decided at the beginning of the year to blog once a week, as well as write a book, I never envisaged just how busy I would get when it comes to pen hitting paper… or finger hitting keyboard…

The beast that is Twitter may be to blame, as Writing Magazine recommended both twitter and blogging as the ideal promotional tools for the aspiring writer, and once ensconced into the social twittering web I started finding like-minded writers at every turn, and soon a vast array of fellow imaginers had entered my world and I was knee-deep in other peoples’ blogs and writers’ promoting their books.

It was – and still is – a lot of fun! I became good friends with a couple of writers (Marni Mann who I have blogged/flash fictioned with) and Jason Tabrys (we started collaborating on a book, but other work projects have distracted us – it will happen, however).

However, once I’d declared my attempts at writing, things seemed to spiral slightly out of control. I started to get requests to help – or work with – other people; complete strangers. I’ve just finished writing for a girl in London who is producing a website for Island talent. My interview was with the hip hop group Born in a Barn, which you can read about in my previous blog. As soon as her website is live I’ll spam it to all and sundry.

A couple of other writers have mentioned collaborating with me on more flash fiction, and Marni and I have teased each other with the possibility of a sequel to our first fare… I’m still inclined to possibly produce it as a short radio play and see if the BBC are interested.

I’m also still knee-deep in my Open University course – Start Writing Fiction. It’s fairly basic, but the more I delved into it, the more and more I am learning. I (stupidly) thought that a lifetime of writing meant I knew exactly what it took to write… but, goddamn, was I wrong! Just ask Marni after she edited my “First 500 Words” blog. That took so much work, learning (on my part), and heavy, heavy editing that at one point – while driving my bus at work – I suddenly wondered what the fuck I was doing and nearly jacked the whole idea of the book in!

But Marni was more than right, it needed some serious polishing… as does the other 13,000 words I’ve written. Not to mention the 250+ pages of handwritten work I’ve already done for The Book!

So, that’s my writers’ workload for the minute; The Book, the course, collaborations, blogging, writing for websites (with a tattoo website having already asked me to cover the Portsmouth Convention for them in two weeks time). I have bitten off a little more than I can chew, so I’m dropping The Book (gasp!) but ONLY for a week. My coursework is due in 7 days time, and after that The Book becomes Priority One again.

So, a blog much ado about nothing, this one. But WordPress challenged it’s users to ‘PostAWeek’ all through this year, and I have done so far.

But, if there’s any consolation I can take from all the work that I’m doing right now, is that when people ask what I do… I used to tell them I was a taxi driver.

Now I tell them I am a writer.